• Martyn Wakefield

MICROWAVE MASSACRE (REVIEW)

Dir. Wayne Berwick

Reviewer. Martyn Wakefield

Firstly, it's evident from the outset that MICROWAVE MASSACRE is not going to reach the heights of cult classic, especially in retrospect of some of the choice sense of humour, and yet despite its blatant sexism and disregard for the greater sex, it's beyond terrible budget and lack of any real attempt to act, there's still something to laugh about. I'm just not sure if it's with the film or at it.


Despite the film's title, there's very little to do with a microwave as husband Donald (Jackie Vernon) finally cracks over his wife's bad cooking and kills her. Soon after he discovers much of her meat is less cow and more human and after discovering the taste, gets a list to continue the family recipe.


For a film about cannibalism, there sure is a lot of breast to tuck into and I don't mean the chicken kind. One seen in particular sees one of the film's buxom babes walk past a fence with a hole positioned to fit in her boobs, only for her torso clothing to come away and for her to continue to wiggle them (unbeknownst) in front of three workmen. Wayne Berwick somehow creates the most unerotic usage of women on film in a way that questions what really is the point to all the degradation. Ironic as there's better acting in a porn film than can be found here with each of Donald's friends being more wooden than a pornstar himself.


The film has its moments but they are far too silly and cheap to fully immerse in, especially a rotten head of Donald's wife hanging around which somehow becomes more rubberised throughout the film.


This is evidently meant to be tongue in cheek but feels heavily dated and unfit for today's audience. Perhaps teens in 1979 will look back at this with nostalgia, for everyone else there's little appetite to put this on the watchlist.


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