THE WISHER (REVIEW)

previously titled SPLICED

Dir. Gavin Wilding

Reviewer. Dan Cook

It is hilariously ironic that a horror film depicting a character being kept awake at night after watching a scary movie almost sent me sleep. My God, was this boring. In THE WISHER, Liane Balaban (who I swear is the result of what happens when you biologically fuse Natalie Portman with Finn Wolfhard) stars as a high school student who loves to be scared by horror movies, even though they cause her to have dreadful nightmares and even make her sleepwalk into the road.

However, after watching a notorious slasher film in the cinema that makes her vomit with fear, she begins to believe that the killer she saw in the picture has actually began to stalk her. If you like your movies to contain universally unlikeable archetypes, minimal violence and a plot that would make Scooby-Doo shake his head in disbelief, then THE WISHER may be the undemanding horror film for you.

If not, then I would avoid this cheap Canadian bore like you would a rusty nail in the scrotum. It’s painfully dull, it’s far from terrifying, it’s drearily predictable and the titular villain looks like the Grim Reaper from the BILL AND TED films cosplaying as a bargain basement Freddy Krueger.